It Was 83 Degrees On Saturday

It's no longer 83 degrees:

Fog

39°F
Feels Like
34°F

Updated: Dec 10 10:45 a.m. CT

(And, trust me, I realize you have no sympathy if you live in, say, Wichita, Kan., but just imagine what a 40-degree plummet over two days will do to your skin. Imagine and then send me Kiehl's products, would you.)

::

My weekend was nice in that it was a weekend and we spent time with friends and family and finished an entire back season of The Amazing Race and not nice in that we put a few hundred miles on my car without leaving the metroplex. Also the check engine light came on and we can't afford to investigate, so we're lovingly patting Sampson's dashboard while complimenting his svelte figure and hoping that buys us a week or so.

Also, over the weekend my dad turned 60 years old. My dad lives in California and I, obviously, don't. I can't remember the last time I spent his birthday with him. I had hoped this year would be an exception, but it wasn't meant to be. Although my relationship with my dad isn't flawless or even great, he's my father, and where I think everyone deserves to enjoy their birthday, my dad is no exception. There are so many words I'm floundering over to offer up and nothing feels adequate, but I do think if we all sat around and tried to one up each other with stories about how our parents fell short of what we wanted/needed from them, I'd undoubtedly trump some and fall devastatingly short of others. He made a lot of mistakes. He did a lot right. I love my father. Very much.

At my wedding, I let my dad pick the song we danced to, and I didn't know what it would be until the moment the music began playing. He chose "You'll Be in my Heart" by Phil Collins. And although there's a lot I could say, a lot of mistakes sprinkled over a lot of years, a lot of heartbreaking ways that things went awry and a lot of damage I could talk about, I'd rather not. Because, again, I love my father. And dancing with him at both my sister's wedding and mine were two of the memories I hold closest to my heart.

I wish I could have spent his birthday with him.

Sometimes loving someone means hoping that what came before will not dictate what is to come. Sometimes loving someone means hoping period.

(My dad wore an A&M hat for most of our reception. I thought it was completely charming.)

Happy birthday, Dad.

(Oh, and save me one of those champagne-filled truffles, will you?)

Comments

[jonniker]

My relationship with my dad has played out similarly, and I think -- and have always assumed -- that it's easier to forgive and move on than hold a grudge for what happened previously. Life is too damn short to be angry or regretful.

As for The Amazing Race ... seriously? Do you know how stressful that show is for me to watch? STRESS. FUL. I can't watch it without wanting to punch out half of the contestants and/or getting diarrhea from the stress of maybe sort of missing a plane. I know for a fact that Adam and I would kill each other dead before we got to the second destination. Some people just aren't built for such journeys.

[jodi]

Happy B-day to your Dad. And what a lovely song choice. my dad would have been like um, song? What's that?

(we danced to through the years by kenny rogers, in case you care.)

[Jess]

Do you have Autozone where you live? Because they, or at least the one in my college town, will look at your check engine light and tell you what the problem is for free. If it's a little problem like a loose gas cap, they'll also turn the light off for you.

Happy birthday to your dad.

[Someone Being Me]

I'm sorry about your car. I completely understand about the relationship with your father. Every family has baggage, it's all in how you carry it. I love the A&M hat.

[Kitty]

I have no sympathy for your sudden "cold snap". Our temps haven't been above freezing since before freaking Thanksgiving! We have almost 6 inches of snow on the ground, darn it! =P

In virtually all modern cars, the "check engine" light represents a problem in the emission control system. Usually it's something very minor: bad gas or the aforementioned loose gas cap. And yes, most of the auto supply stores will read your codes and tell you what the supposed issue is.

And happy, happy birthday to your daddy. Regardless of any mistakes he's made, he brought YOU into the world, so that altruistic move on his part trumps all.

Hugs!

[Angella]

Oh!

You made me cry!

Because there is so much I could write about my Dad. In the same spirit.

But he reads my site. And so I cannot.

Maybe I need to start a secret site so I can post freely ;)

Beautiful post, my friend.

[Heather B.]

I loved this. I've been feeling the same about my father and yesterday we had a really good day together and I realized that harping on what happened before really isn't going to help a thing. So I'm now looking forward to moving on in hopes that the future will be far better than the past.

[Janssen]

Definitely the same thing around these parts - warm beautiful weekend, freezing, foggy, depressing Monday. Also? My husband had to go to San Antonio with our one car, so he had to drop me off at work at SIX THIRTY a.m. (I don't start until 9:00 a.m. usually).

Oh, pardon me. . . was this not a forum to whine about my insignificant problems? Whoops!

[kerrianne]

Doing things the non-traditional way during our vow-taking, I missed dancing with my father, but I like to think we had the greatest walk down the aisle in the history of all walks. Outside, down to the beach, with the sun shining and both of us laughing. I feel so blessed whenever I think on it, and I love that.

Happy! birthday to your Daddy-O.

[Stephanie]

happy birthday to jennie's dad! thanks for bringing rachel and jennie into my world!

PS ok. i can stand it no longer. what does A&M stand for????

[bethany actually]

Sometimes loving someone means hoping that what came before will not dictate what is to come. Sometimes loving someone means hoping period.

Once again, you leave me speechless with your gorgeous wordcraft.

[Kristie]

That was so sweet.

[Michelle & The City]

"Sometimes loving someone means hoping that what came before will not dictate what is to come."

what a great quote. this stands true for so many different kinds of relationships.

[Lisa]

That was beautiful, and it made me cry. Heh.

[Unnaturally Blonde]

Oh Happy Belated Birthday to J's Dad!!! Sorry I am so behind on my reading. Damn work, always getting in the way. I heard a rumor that Texas A&M was facing Penn State in a bowl game this year??? Hmmm. Bring it on J!! Bring it on!