Dragging Along

Do you know what makes today different than any other day this week? I put on makeup! Now, I'm not proud of this--it's not something that really deserves that exclamation mark, I realize--but it's quite impressive, in its own pathetic way. I got up on Monday (albeit ridiculously later than I usually get up for work) and sort of zombie-walked my way through the afternoon. Tuesday I had meetings--plural!--but threw on jeans and a tank top and thank goodness that sort of outfit flies in my office. Yesterday was more of the same. When I got up today a strange thought sort of fluttered around in my head: Maybe I should think about applying a little foundation today, maybe even some eyeshadow! And then I realized that I would have to retrieve the makeup bag from my still-packed suitcase strewn about on my bedroom floor. I think it's officially time to rejoin the land of responsible men and women and, you know, do some laundry and put on a little lip-gloss. (The lip-gloss is for the latter group, of course. Or, come to think of it, for either. I don't judge.)

But I just can't shake the exhaustion I carried back from California with me. I need to get back on my workout schedule, as that usually lends me some extra energy. Apparently sucking down Diet Coke isn't as effective (or sweaty). Or perhaps I just need to go to sleep BEFORE TWO IN THE MORNING. You have no idea how badly I wish I were kidding about that time--on both Monday AND Tuesday night. For no real reason! Unless you count browsing people.com a real reason which you probably don't. Because you were probably asleep AT TWO IN THE MORNING like I should have been.

So, anyway, what are you doing this weekend? I'm going to IKEA. For the first time! EVER! I know, I know! How is that possible? There has been one just across town from us for the entire three years we've lived here, but Target was always just a wee bit closer and no-one told me IKEA had a food-court until just this week. (Is the food good? Should I bring designated snack money?) I am in search of a new desk, some nightstands, maybe even some magnets if I'm feeling crazy enough.

Moving along to something entirely unrelated: Are you watching Top Chef? (Quasi-spoilers below! You've been warned!) I've talked about this show before, and I wish I could say my obsession has waned some but no, not quite. Even though Spike--my Top Chef boyfriend--packed his knives (and his fedora) last week, he was back last night(!) to assist Richard (who is my pick to win the whole thing although I'd be fine with Stephanie taking it as well--since she, somehow, totally resisted stabbing Dale in the eyes for leaving her PORK BELLY sitting uncovered and exposed in a balmy Puerto Rican kitchen [which sounds gross before you think of flies buzzing around it] overnight forcing her to scramble and make something else, something she hadn't prepped for at all, and she seemed GENUINELY forgiving with him which made me kind of want to buy her a drink and stab him in the eyes myself, although, admittedly, he did seem fairly apologetic--but I will be appalled if Lisa wins because 1) she's mean and 2) she sucks. AND THOSE ARE THE NICEST THINGS I CAN SAY ABOUT HER. I keep waiting for her to throw something across the kitchen. She just comes across as a thrower or a wall-kicker or a pot-banger or something else kinda violent. So, what exactly am I going to do after the finale next week? I just can't imagine not getting to hear Padma kind of casually tell someone their dish was inedible. I presented Mike with this question at the end of last night's episode, and then I said, "I know! I'll try to make a few Top Chef recipes over the summer!" Bravo.com has recipes posted from different episodes like this one and this one and (yum) this one, too. Mike looked at me--sweetly, even--and said, "Baby, please don't try to make those dishes. Please."

Finally, I'm getting my hair cut tonight and then I have big plans to watch the freshly downloaded Suburban Girl which I hear is just awful--straight to video, never even had a release date, twee advertising budget, obviously horrific movie poster kind of awful--but it's loosely based on my favorite book, "The Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing" and I feel I owe it to Jane (the main character of the book who was renamed Brett in the movie; I don't quite get that either) to see how badly Sarah Michelle Gellar screws things up. And I'll yell and throw popcorn at the TV and everything, which I'm totally serious about. I've already told Molly to skip lunch so she can properly clean the discarded popcorn as I throw it. She is pretty pumped about it, I'm not gonna lie.

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(Oh! Before I forget. Thanks to everyone who responded to my "best blogs you read" question in the last post. I have a bursting Google Reader account now! I'm going to leave the post open for another day or so and then pick a winner for the gift card after that. Tell your friends so they can participate! Or, don't, if you'd prefer a better chance at winning.)

Comments

[Domesticated White Trash]

Ikea food is delicious. And cheap! And if you like coffee, make sure you buy the pound of coffee they sell. It's absolutely delish!

[Kristabella]

I'm half-Swedish, so I love that you can buy potato sausage at IKEA. And the last time I was there, they had $1 ice cream cones!

Dude! I just finished watching Top Chef. I HATE LISA! WHAT THE EFF WAS UP WITH THAT CONGRATULATIONS THING?? I would have bitch slapped her!

I think Richard will win. I think he's super talented and creative.

[Rhi]

IS THE FOOD AT IKEA GOOD!?!? It's only awesome. You'll need to order the meatballs.

Also I loved Suburban Girl! So did my coworker (not Cherie, a different one)

[Sharon]

Wow - first time at Ikea?! Hee. I'm sure you'll love it. If I had the money, I'd totally be there every weekend. I heart their furniture. I've only had their cinnamon buns, but those were excellent. The food is so damn cheap though, so you won't need much extra cash.

[Sierra]

Confession: I've never been to IKEA either.

And, I did NOT know that there was a movie based on Girl's Guide to Hunting and Fishing!!! I will need to find this ASAP!

[jodifur]

Really? There is a movie of that book. You sent it to me and I loved it, I'll have to had that to netflix.

[Raven]

I HATE LISA!

Can we stab her in the eyes? Please?

[Sarah]

Ikea:
First time...really?
Oh and the food court is okayish I mean it's good if you like norweigenish food. But they have like glazed meatballs too, I don't get it.

Oh but they have like a little market area with great cookies and snacks, I would bring the aforementioned snack money for.

[Jeanelle]

I can't decide who is going to win Top Chef. I've loved Richard from the beginning but I kind of think "they" want a woman to win, which I would be totally okay with -- as long as it's Stephanie and not that stupid, rude, mean Lisa. I still can't believe she's there ahead of both Spike & Antonia. Richard is so smart and so creative. I loved what he did last night -- food inspired both by Puerto Rico and wherever he grew up. It'll be exciting to see who pulls it out next week.

[andrea]

Enjoy your inaugural Ikea outing, it will never hold the same awe as it does on your first trip.

I can't even come up with one not terribly inappropriate thing to say about Lisa. She is an evil witch and definitely not a great chef and if she wins I'll never watch the show again. I about died when she all but demanded congratulations at the end of the episode last night. Doesn't she realize she's burned all her bridges with her terrible attitude. Oh how I loathe her. I think Richard will take the whole thing, but I will be just fine if it ends up being Stephanie.

[Larissa]

I screamed at the TV when Lisa got passed into the top three...are you freakin kidding me? She's an awful person, and based on her character and personality, should have been kicked off ages ago. I've liked Stephanie and Richard from the beginning.

[britt]

my husband and i rented suburban girl a while ago. i fell asleep halfway through but that doesn't mean anything because i fall asleep during most movies. it was actually okay but i do think my husband enjoyed it more than i did which is kind of strange. there was a great overall message in the end anyway.

[Nicole]

You are going to LOVE Ikea! I can spend hours and hours in their home accessories department. I need to head out their soon myself. Have a lovely weekend.

[She Likes Purple]

Andrea: The awkward "congratulations" moment was so odd! If I were either of them (who both then had the maturity to congratulate her) I would have kicked her. That's just me though.

Britt: Read the book! The message in it sort of blew me away (at age 21), but it's fantastic and such a quick read.

[slynnro]

I was SO MAD about Antonia leaving. I think she is the second best chef. But like I said, RICHARD ALL THE WAY! He's so nice! And looks so much like Cynthia Nixon's girlfriend!

[Jen]

No Ikea around here, so I'm feeling a little jealous of your shopping trip! I've heard great things about the cinnamon buns...hope you'll give us your review!

[Jess]

I do not watch Top Chef. Cooking shows are just something I will never understand. I especially do not understand people who watch cooking shows while at the gym. It just seems counterproductive.

[Natalie]

oh, honey please get some rest this weekend! I don't think I've washed my hair in 4 days.....

The food at Ikea is pretty cheap, and tastes pretty cheap. I had macaroni and cheese. Very bizarre I know. Micah had a coke which was not refillable. My warning about Ikea is that you do not go there just to wander around. You really need to be on a mission, or you will become so overwhelmed.

See you soon!

[K]

I have yet to go to IKEA as well. There is one about 40 minutes from my apartment but I have just never gone. Maybe when I get a house.
I also don't usually wear makeup on a regular basis. I put some on sometimes on the weekends if I'm going out somewhere but sometimes I even go out without makeup.
I love cooking shows but do not watch Top Chef. Maybe I'll catch one of those marathons someday. :)

[Angella]

You have never been to IKEA?!?

I am shocked and amazed. I pink puffy heart LOVE IKEA.

[Sarah in LA]

IKEA rules. Be prepared to spend thousands of dollars.

What I don't understand about Lisa is this: it's been a few months since the last episode aired. She had time to watch herself pout, scowl, and stand there with her damn arms crossed during the judge's table.

SO WHY WAS SHE STILL STANDING THERE WITH HER ARMS CROSSED? Didn't she see how angry it made her look on TV?

I don't get it. I really hope she doesn't win - she's unhappy, plus she's not as good as the other two (or Antonia).

[Amy]

I'm going to Ikea today, also! It will be my second trip as the first one last month didn't allow enough time to really get the whole experience. Hope you enjoy your trip!

[Camels & Chocolate]

How was your IKEA experience??? Did I build it up too much for you?

[Heather]

I cannot believe you have never been to IKEA! I love the mirror that your bought!

[Heather B.]

Ok I must know what you thought of Suburban Girl. Seriously effing awful right??? So bad and yet I continued to watch anyway even though I thought I would vomit every single time SMG and Alec Baldwin locked lips.

Also the name Archie Knox just screams 'possible pedophile' or 'cradle robber'. It was all just so skeavy.

Obviously I paid attention though because I just could not look away.

Excuse me while a wretch a bit.