Giveaway (but not here); other stuff too

You don't come here to read posts about other blogs, I know, so forgive me for continually forcing Style Lush-related odds-and-ends down your throat. I'm just so proud of the site and the writers. I had this little idea one day, and it's now an actual thing. That's cool, no matter how late that little idea keeps me up each night (hint: hella late). Hey, maybe you can benefit from my late nights.

We're offering one Style Lush reader a free Kramey Martin banner. Free! That's a really good price for a banner. Enter to win by midnight on Thursday, 10/29, which is basically tonight. So, go comment. That's all you have to do! 

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This year has easily been the craziest, hardest, most rewarding of my life, and as I approach 2010 and then Kyle's first birthday, I think of all I did and didn't do and what I'd like next year to look like. 

More than anything, I'd like to be more thoughtful of the people in my life. More often than not, my mom reads news or happenings about me and Kyle on Twitter instead of directly from me. Friends see Facebook status updates instead of personal e-mails or phone calls. Birthdays go by unnoticed or even unmentioned. I'm not proud of any of this, and I'm trying to find the delicate balance of being the kind of person I can respect -- the kind who goes out of her way for the people in her life -- while still staying strong and secure -- not letting other people's thoughts and opinions dictate how I feel. 

One thing I'm doing is co-hosting a champagne and cake party with Kristie next month. There is no special occasion for the party except the desire to get a bunch of friends together for a night. So often, insecurities cause us to begrudge the successes and joys of our friends because of our own shortcomings. This is a quality of mine -- the tendency to knee-jerkingly envy other people's lives instead of feeling genuine happiness for them -- that I hate and that I'd like to nip in the bud. Like yesterday. So, we've invited a houseful of people over to sip a champagne cocktail and to munch on cake and cupcakes. Not a bad idea, right? Mike asked if this was just an excuse to eat cupcakes and send out an evite. It annoys me when I'm reminded he knows me so well.

I also want to get my stress in check over the next few months, before Kyle's memories really start to form. I do a lot, and this is how I choose it. I don't have to blog or throw parties or go on trips, but I like having things to look forward to. I enjoy almost everything I choose to fill my life with (other than the dishes; those blow), but I spend most days tense, tired, snappy. I hate that. I talked a little bit about my thoughts on taking real and true care of myself -- physically -- at Bodies in Motivation, and I'm excited to get happy on the outside.

It's a little early to start looking to the new year and new changes, but as we gear up for the holidays, and I realize we have so much to do throughout the rest of 2009 to make some awesome Kyle's-first-holidays memories, this stuff has been on my mind a lot.

The first year as a mother is pure insanity, at least it has been for me, and I'm finally starting to design the life I want, on this side of normal.

Comments

[Kristabella]

I feel the same way about keeping in touch with people, etc. But then I think, without my blog and FB, I would be much worse. At least now my friends have an idea of what is going on in my life. And man, thank God for FB and the birthday reminders! At least people get a text or a wall comment, as opposed to pre-FB when I just plum forgot!

[jane]

When my daughter was about 6 months old, I was reminded that it's all about priorities. It's not that I don't have time to do all the things I would like to do (blog, paint my fingernails or even clean the foyer closet), it's that I choose to do other things with my time. Sure there are things I can't control completely (job, commute, etc.) but with only a few hours after work to spend with my daughter I choose to play with her. And when she is in bed and I need to be getting there myself and I see the dishes in the sink, I can now look at them and know I have a choice and choosing to blog or watch TV or spend time with my husband is often what I choose. The difference between now and before is that I am much more conscious of how I prioritize my activities. And knowing that I don't have time to reply to every email in my inbox but that I did play hide and seek with her instead, makes those unread emails a WHOLE lot easier to live with... It's a great sanity check to be aware of those sub-conscious decisions that we make each day.

[maggie]

Why haven't *I* thought of a champagne and cake for no reason party? THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST PARTY EVER. Also: can I come?

[Christina]

Jen, do you know how incredible you are? The though of you thinking anyone is better or has it easier is just crazy to me. From here you have a life full of exactly what you want. You decide what it is and you go for it. Lots of us aren't that brave. That party is for you because you deserve it.

[Janssen]

I love your posts like this - you really inspire me to live more meaningfully.

[Remodeling Contractors Raleigh]

Now this is hghly recommeded post for me. I will surely email this to my friend.

Regards
Natalie