The entire time I was traveling across the great state of California, one constant thought kept playing on a loop in my mind: I am so lucky to have my husband. I am the luckiest. Not just because he physically stayed home to watch Kyle while I sipped champagne and slept in, although, yeah, that was important, but because he encouraged me to go, repeatedly told me to enjoy myself, urged me to forget about our money woes for at least the five days I was gone. When I talked to him throughout my trip, he'd say, "I hope you're having fun, baby." When I called him hungover on Saturday morning, apologizing for the drunken phone call the night before -- the "I'm not drunk, baby, I'm just drinking" phone call -- he laughed, nothing else.
I am not an easy person to live with, and although I do the dishes and the laundry and always get up to make Kyle's bottles in the morning, I also sigh and act put-upon and demand lots of attention and reassurance. I know my even-tempered, level-headed, funny husband wishes I'd just BRING IT DOWN A NOTCH EVERY NOW AND THEN, WOMAN.
But instead of saying that, he kisses me every morning when I leave for work and every evening when I get home. He pauses the TV when I want to tweet something hilarious. He eats whatever I cook and says things like, "Yeah, this isn't too bad," WHEN IT IS IN FACT INEDIBLE. He thanks me, every day, for the things I do for him and Kyle.
Kyle likes Mike more than me, and I don't even blame him. Mike is fun! And funny! And he never furrows his brow over our cell phone bill or the roach in the laundry room or dropping a glass. I've been saying "no" to Kyle since the very beginning, to get him used to the word, and Mike hasn't said "no" once. He doesn't flinch when Kyle bangs his head or pukes. He rolls with parenthood like a pro, like he was made to be this kid's dad, like he's been a father forever and ever. People who know Mike laugh and say, "I can't believe someone as childish as Mike HAS HIS OWN CHILD," and they shake their heads while I say whole-heartedly, "Oh, no! You've got it all wrong! He's a great dad. He's the very best dad there is."
I am so proud I chose that man to be my kid's father.
Mike is the least competitive, least jealous man I've ever known. He is genuinely happy for everyone's successes and genuinely down for everyone's bumps and bruises. Nothing about life really startles him or rattles him. When I left last week, multiple people said, "God, how is Mike going to handle it? Is he freaked out?" Oh god no. When it comes to taking care of Kyle, Mike feels only one thing: honored. He's never upset or stressed or bothered. He rolls with it. He soaks it up. When I got home he said, "We had a freaking blast together." He meant it.
My husband drives me crazy. He does. I roll my eyes and raise my voice and WOULD IT KILL YOU TO WASH A SOCK EVERY NOW AND THEN? As he snoozes on Saturday mornings, I curse him from the couch. He can be unromantic and slightly clueless and he doesn't play any mind games, which is annoying when I really want to play one. He drives me crazy, you should really know that. We fight. We've had some doozies in our day, fights that would make you really uncomfortable if you witnessed them. We've gone to bed angry more than once, and I holler across the house, "YOU ARE DRIVING ME INSANE!" at least once a week. And he does drive me insane. I have rolled my eyes more in the last six years than I ever did as a teenager, and I rolled my eyes a lot back then. He's stubborn and frustrating and he snores very loudly. He also hogs the DVR like you wouldn't believe, and when he says to me, "Can we delete Oprah?" even though 80% of the used space is because of his boring Discovery channel shows, I want to kick him. Hard and repeatedly. But, on this day, the day before his birthday, you should also know this:
My husband is the kind of person I'd like to be one day.
Happy 32nd birthday, babe. Every year that I get to celebrate this day with you is another year I've gotten to spend with you. So, I'd say we both get gifts.
{If you feel so inclined, tell Mike happy birthday in the comments. He loves my readers just as much as I do.}
Happy Birthday, Mike!
Posted by: K | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 08:01 AM
Happy Birthday to your hubby! He sounds great!
Posted by: Rachel | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 08:24 AM
Happy Birthday!
Posted by: Raven | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 09:01 AM
Happy Birthday Mike - you are both lucky to have created such a good team - amso mike and my mom share a birthday and he soundds like a truly balanced Libra...
Posted by: Dani | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 09:44 AM
Happy Birthday!
Posted by: C @ Kid Things | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:10 AM
Happy Happy Birthday Mike!
Also--I think this post is about 17 different kind of awesome, warts and all.
xox
Posted by: heidikins | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:26 AM
YAY Mike! Happy Birthday to you! YOu guys sound like a great couple! I love that you are honest and real. When my husband and I have kids, I'm going to make him read this post...so Mike, if you want to "guest post" anytime in the near future and give some tips for dads...:)
Posted by: Karmyn | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:31 AM
Happy birthday mike!! :)
Posted by: Colleen | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:32 AM
Happy birthday, Mike!
Posted by: Maura | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:34 AM
HAPPY BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRTHDAY, MIKE!
I have been reading you for, what, over 2 years now? And i totally feel like I know you and Mike. Like I want to be all, you guys coming over for pizza and movie night tonight? And Mike is an awesome and fabulous guy. But what I really appreciate is the honesty about the fights and the annoyances...reminds me that though I sometimes have to squelch an urge to throw things at Jason's head, we still have an awesome relationship.
Hope you guys both celebrate royally.
Posted by: rebecca | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:39 AM
Happy Birthday, Mike! You sound like a great guy, and I hope you and Jennie (and Kyle, of course) have a wonderful birthday weekend.
Posted by: Gaby | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 10:41 AM
What a great post. Happy Birthday Mike!!
Posted by: Tessie | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:05 AM
Happy birthday Michael, you old man, you. It's about time you caught up with me. See you tonight where I promise to rub in fact that you are OLD ALL NIGHT LONG. :-)
Posted by: Kristie | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:11 AM
Happy Birthday, Mike!
Reading this made met think of my own husband, who sounds a lot like Mike. Our anniversary is this weekend and you've reminded me that I have a lot to celebrate.
Posted by: MrsBagley | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:16 AM
Happy Birthday Mike, I have to say you sound like a pretty darn good guy. I am so happy that you and Jennie found each other :)
Posted by: Abby | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:16 AM
Happy Birthday, O Paragon of Husbandly Awesomeness! Fifty points to you!
Posted by: Erin | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:19 AM
Happy birthday, Mike. You sound like a great guy!
Posted by: Carrie | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:35 AM
Happy birthday, Mike!
Posted by: Rebecca (Bearca) | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:43 AM
Awww, what a great guy. Hope I get to meet him and the kiddo one day. Until then, hope his day is great and that the two of you enjoy the shit out of that canned champagne!
Posted by: Amy --- Just A Titch | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 11:54 AM
Happy Birthday Mike!!
Posted by: Anna | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 12:21 PM
Happy Birthday Mike! I loved this post Jennie! It sounds like you are married to a wonderful man! I like the fact that you didn't coat your post with only sweet nothings, but shared the real things that happen in life with the one you love, even if they are not so sweet!
Enjoy your weekend! :)
Posted by: Shelly | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 12:26 PM
Happy Birthday Mike! I hope you have an awesome one - you deserve it.
Posted by: Elizabeth | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 12:53 PM
Happy Birthday, Mike!!!!! We'll party tonight! Awesome post, Jennie!
Posted by: Heather | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 01:42 PM
Happy Birthday Mike!
Posted by: Kaleigha | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 01:56 PM
Happy birthday, Mike! Your marriage sounds a lot like mine!
Posted by: Shelly | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 02:59 PM
You've such a way with words; this is beautiful!
Happy Birthday Mike!
Posted by: barbetti | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 06:53 PM
I had forgotten that Mike's birthday is the day after Jon's :) Happy birthday, Mike! Thanks for letting your wife spend so much of her free time sharing her thoughts with us, her blog friends! Enjoy your special day.
Posted by: La Petite Chic | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 07:01 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE! And congrats on being such a good man, husband and father. It's pretty awesome when woman can say such wonderful things about her husband on the internet (I have a good one over here too, and my daughter likes him WAY better than me, ha ha!!!).
Posted by: Manda | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 07:26 PM
Wow, what a sweet post.
Posted by: Bobbi Janay | Friday, October 02, 2009 at 08:43 PM
Oh hooray! happy birthday, Mike. Sounds like you definitely picked a winner, Jennie. Beautiful post.
Posted by: annie | Saturday, October 03, 2009 at 01:44 AM
Happy Birthday Mike! Hope you had a blast.
Posted by: Holley | Saturday, October 03, 2009 at 08:17 AM
Too late for the birthday, so I'm just going to take the liberty to say: Mike, happy year!
Posted by: nicolien | Saturday, October 03, 2009 at 01:52 PM
Happy birthday! What a great-sounding man! Love the picture with Kyle.
Posted by: Leigh | Saturday, October 03, 2009 at 09:16 PM
Happiest of birthdays Mike! It sounds like you both are providing a wonderful example to Kyle of what a respectful, loving marriage is about. It's real, and not always "pretty", but full of love, forgiveness and acceptance.
Congrats on another year to celebrate!
Posted by: Kate @ Life As I Live It | Saturday, October 03, 2009 at 10:40 PM
I'm a day late, but Happy Birthday Mike!!
(Jennie, this goes without saying, b/c I say it EVERY time I post, but I LOVE your writing. So much.)
Posted by: Megan | Sunday, October 04, 2009 at 01:08 AM
Happy birthday Mike! It looks like I missed a really fun party!
Posted by: Natalie | Sunday, October 04, 2009 at 07:06 PM