I sat down last night and wrote a thank-you note to someone who showed me kindness well over a year ago. It was so overdue, I fear she won't even know what the hell I'm talking about when she gets it.
But, she needs to know what she did mattered (still matters, even), and I need to remember there is not a statue of limitations on being grateful or for thanking someone.
When I created my 2010 to-do list, I wasn't creating a big picture life list or a want-to-roam-with-tigers-in-wherever-tigers-live dream travel list because I've done that before (in college, in fact) and that list is in a box somewhere, very dusty. I can't tell you a single thing that was on it.
Although I think there might have been a bullet about dating a boy in a band.
Dreaming is good, guys, no one believes that more than me. I can dream up a helluva life, let me tell you, and I change my mind about my own life on a daily basis because of that little bitty dreamer chip in my brain. Let's live in Alaska! Let's start a running club! Let's have regular dinner parties! Let's remodel the bathroom!
I am utterly exhausting to be married to. Or to know.
(I've felt badly for any regular readers more than once for having to keep track of all the dreams I dream up.)
Anyway, I created my to-do list to center myself, to focus on very small things I was continually letting get away from me because I was too busy watching The Bachelor or napping or eating every pizza in a three-mile radius.
More than anything, though, I wanted to create this list so I could be more aware of what my life was becoming, who I was becoming. Did I want to be a runner? Then I'd need to run. Did I want to read more? Then I'd need to pick up some damn books.
I spent all of 2009 in what felt like a very carb-lined fog, and I just wanted to wake up.
I'm a Capricorn, so I made a list.
A friend came over more than a year ago and showed me kindness and generosity and I never properly thanked her, and it was time to. It was far past time to, in fact. And although running a 5K was pretty spectacular and throwing a birthday party for Kyle was really important to me, and I'll always be glad I did it, writing that thank-you note was one of the most important things I've ever done.
And it wasn't on any list.
You should write books and blogs and life lists to remember, to record, to collect, to focus, but you should never create a life just to have something to write about.
Trust me, the living is always more important.