She Likes Purple

My Favorite To-Do List To Date

In case you're into looking back on (many) failed tasks and (also many) tasks with lines drawn through them, here are my 2010, 2011, and 2012 to-do lists.

2013 is below.

I tried hard to create tangible goals that weren't intimidating. Sure, I have some bigger, abstract goals that are hard to put on a list because you can't really cross them off, such as complain less, accept help more, be far less lazy, etc., but I think this list may be my best list yet. We'll see, of course. But I like it a lot.

1. Earn a 100-class yoga bracelet
2. Go on an overnight trip with Kristie and our families (possibly to Jellystone Park)
3. Visit a new state
4. Cook one dish a week from the cookbooks I own (52 delicious recipes!) 
5. Don't purchase a new cookbook the entire year
6. Finish Couch to 5K
7. Finish Couch to 10K
8. Make an eye appointment and buy new glasses (It's TIME. I've had my current ones as long as I've had Kyle.)
9. Finish a month of (the basic bones of) Whole30 (as a mostly vegetarian who eats a little fish)
10. Host a Friendsgiving
11. Read every book on Elizabeth's best of 2012 list
12. Read every book selected by my (awesome) book club (I've already read January and February's picks. Score!)
13. Run a 5K and a 10K (try to PR)
14. Take a stab at one Pinterest-inspired project a month. A new recipe, a craft, etc. (I'll call it "Pin of the Month," or something dorky like that.)
15. Finish Kyle's book of letters (This has been on my list for a while, I know, but it's a big project. I just need to make the time for it this year.)
16. Create our second family yearbook
17. Email Kyle every day of the year (365 Days of Emails)
18. Read 25 books throughout the year
19. Throw a champagne-inspired dinner party for my ladies
20. Seriously, get that third tattoo (I think I finally know what I want it to be)
21. Go horseback riding
22. Get my passport updated; get Kyle a passport (I wanted to do this in 2012 but, sheesh, you have to pay to update your name if the passport is over 5 years old. Uncool!)
23. Go a month without dairy
24. As much as possible, no eating after 9PM (obviously this can't always be helped and this is all about curbing the mindless snacking, not about skipping a late dinner)
25. Read the Bible (some of it, all of it, we'll see)
26. Learn a little web design and create one sidebar badge or Facebook cover or SOMETHING web-related
27. Pay off Mike's student loans (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (this deserves that many exclamation points, trust me)
28. Buy a living room rug
29. Hang travel photos above our couch
30. Menu plan each (and every) month
31. Figure out a shoe storage solution for my teeny, tiny closet
32. Don't buy a single new pair of shoes all of 2013
33. Take more neighborhood walks
34. Spraypaint something
35. Take a picture of what I'm wearing every Friday (or at least once a week), so I can pretend I'm as stylish as Elizabeth and also so I can be motivated to dress better
36. Make lasagna for a neighbor
37. Get a new pet
38. Take a family photo shoot (why do my favorite photographers have to live so far away!?)
39. Take Kyle to an Aggie football game
40. Make no-sew curtains
41. Clean out and organize all my kitchen drawers
42. Buy new hardware for my kitchen drawers/cabinets
43. Go on a weekend trip with Natalie, to celebrate being friends for 20 years
44. Paint our living room
45. Wear skinny jeans.
46. Buy/Make a personalized viewfinder for Kyle
47. Write an article/post about parenting an only child
48. Make Mike baked ziti again, the right way
49. Start Justified
50. Throw Kyle an awesome fourth birthday party
51. Re-read The Great Gatsby, in anticipation of seeing the movie
52. Take Kyle to a Rangers game
53. Run a race in Austin
54. Stay the night in Denton
55. Volunteer again with Meals On Wheels
56. Feel better about my physical health at the end of the year than at the start of it
57. Buy new champagne flutes
58. Eat a Butter Lane cupcake
59. Dance with my husband on our 6th anniversary
60. Pay off one credit card
61. Get my car detailed (and then try to keep that bad boy clean)
63. Do a full month (30 straight days!) of the 30-Day Shred
64. Set up a monthly Skype date with my sister and nephew
65. Be happy

I reserve the right to change, edit, and add to this list because that's the awesome thing about creating lists. I just want this year to be good, to be peaceful, to be full. Oh, I hope it can be all that.

Much Love

Most of our holiday cards have found their way to where they are supposed to go by now (and the stragglers should be there any day). 2012 is nearly done. We're this close to a new year and before we head into that new, blank slate, let me say that I'm so happy you visited this spot at any time this past year.

I feel so lucky for my boys, my family, my friends, my health, my job, and for you.

I'm so lucky, so thankful, so grateful.

As the card says, much love to you. Much, much love.

My 2012

(2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011, first inspired all those years ago by Linda)

1. What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?

I was interviewed about my day job on television (which I still haven't gotten the courage to even watch), kayaked in the ocean, potty-trained my kid, gave up meat (well, red and poultry), took Kyle to Disneyland, drank a Pimm's Cup in New Orleans, swam with bio-luminescent plankton in Puerto Rico, went zip-lining, was made marketing director at my company (!!), threw Mike a (kick-ass, to me) 35th birthday party, became a "soccer" mom, saw Jersey Boys, held my best friend's baby boy (Jack!), watched my school's QB win the Heisman, went to a fancy television premeire (wearing Target jersey cotton!), celebrated five years of marriage, interviewed a Top Chef, visited Cornell University, celebrated Christmas with both my son and my sister's son.

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I'm quick to say I didn't but when I look at the list of new things I did (directly above), I'm also quick not to care.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes! Mike's sister (baby Ava!), Natalie, Jonna, many other friends. It was a good year for babies.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Mike's grandmother passed away in March, and it was a hard time for his whole family. She was an incredible woman, who taught Mike to be kind. We miss her.

5. What countries did you visit?

Just the U.S., again. I visited four states (Oklahoma, Louisiana, California, and New York) and also Puerto Rico.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you didn't have in 2012?

Such a good question. I think I'll go tangible and say, I'd like to have a new pin in my wall map, a new living room rug, a pair of skinny jeans, a 100-class yoga bracelet, and just a few more smiles. Always a few more smiles.

7. What dates from 2012 will be etched upon your memory, and why?

The usual suspects, February 5th (Kyle turned 3!) and May 19th (married for 5 whole years!) but also November 6th, the day President Obama was re-elected. I try not to get too political here but, damn, was I happy to pop the cork on some champagne that night. (Or, technically, super early the morning of November 7th.)

8. What was your biggest achievement of this year?

I got a promotion at work, which feels very big and cool and awesome. I also potty-trained a child and while I promised not to talk about it online (you're welcome), it was still a very big feat.

9. What was your biggest failure?

The same yo-yo lost/gained/lost/gained-again weight dance I like to do. Trust me, it's just as annoying for me as it likely is for you. 2013, will you please be different?

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing out of the ordinary, thank goodness. I will say that I'm not a fan of the my-kid-catches-pneumonia-a-week-before-Christmas thing that happened to me.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Let's get really specific: Disneyland tickets. That day, with the glee written all over Kyle's face, was a worth-the-pricetag day.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

I feel like this is a good time to thank two really incredible people--my mom and Mike's mom. They each love Mike, Kyle, and me--together and individually--and I feel very blessed and very grateful every time I think of them. I'd throw a party every week to celebrate them, if I could. (That could get pricey and weird, though.)

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I hate this question because actual people I know come to mind. I don't want to think of them when I think of my year, quite honestly.

14. Where did most your money go?

Bills, bills, debt, bills, travel, day care, bills, (and, fine) shoes.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

I got to talk to Spike Mendelsohn (TALK TO HIM!) and I also got to stand in line, holding my kiddo's hand right before introducing him to Mickey Mouse. Don't worry, 19-year-old me is just as disgusted as you are at that previous sentence.

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?

Oh, come on. Me and every other person with a pulse will say "Call Me, Maybe."

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

Happier: about the same
Thinner: about the same, maybe a few pounds more
Richer: yes

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Worked out, gone to bed earlier, all the healthier-choices wishes. But wishing for different never brings different, so I kind of hate this question.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Honestly, I wish I had been less lazy and less grouchy. Still, can't change the fact that I was often lazy and grouchy.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

It was a good day. I was with my mom, my sister and her family, my boys, and my Molly. I hadn't spent Christmas with my sister in 15 years and just getting to see her that morning was something else. Not to mention the moment Kyle opened a bag of candy and yelled, "JUST WHAT I WANTED!" 

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?

I'd say I fell in love with yoga in 2012.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Are any of you shocked to hear Sons of Anarchy? Also, The Good Wife and Sports Night. Oh, and becase we keep it real, The Vampire Diaries. I sure hope this guilty pleasure doesn't go the way of Gossip Girl for me.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

Let's skip this bummer of a question, shall we?

24. What was the best book you read?

In the Woods, easily.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Of Monsters & Men, The Lumineers.

26. What did you want and get?

A five-year trip with my guy.

27. What did you want and not get?

A lot, but there's always 2013.

28. What was your favorite film of 2012?

People Like Us, I'd have to say. It was such a subtly beautiful film, especially for those of us with some father issues. I also just saw Lawless and really liked it.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 30! I had a party at my house, and many of my favorite people brought me champagne and gifts and hugs.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

A winning lottery ticket, always.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2012?

"She bought many adorable shoes, but she consistenly wore her Old Navy flats."

32. What kept you sane?

Yoga, writing, Natalie, Cherie, Mike, my family, (bad) TV, Twitter, good champagne, and that three-year-old boy of mine who gives the best hugs of anyone I've ever known.  

33. What political issue stirred you the most?

Every year, the same issue moves me like no other: those of the same sex who just want a marriage like I have. When I think of what I have with Mike--the fights, the love, the laughter, the tight hugs, and the easy conversation--and then I think that two people also want that but can't have it because of their anatomy and because of others' religion, I just get sick. I do. I know it's poloarizing! I know I may love you while you're against it! But I can't be against an adult who just wants to lay in bed and hold the hand of someone he/she calls "husband" or "wife" like I lay in bed and hold the hand of the person I get to call husband. I just can't. I never will be against that. Marriage equality. It moves me every year, among many other political issues.

34. Who did you miss?

If you don't live in driving distance, I miss you. (Same answer as last year.)

35. Who was the best new person you met?

I met Liz in 2012, for the first time, in person. We had tacos and margaritas and then we watched The Vampire Diaries on my couch and I just really hated geography when she had to leave. She's such a lovely, wonderful, hilarious, perfect friend, and I would have her over every week if I could.

I also met Caitlin and Carla for the first time and I love all three of these ladies so much I just feel like they will all be at my 50th birthday party and maybe at Kyle's wedding. You know those friends you meet in unconventional ways, the ones you chuckle a little bit when you introduce them to your mother-in-law at your vow renewal ceremony because, hahahaha, we actually met because of our blogs! Isn't that funny! Yeah, my gut tells me that these three ladies will be in my life forever. I'd be so lucky if that turns out to be true, my gut also tells me.

36. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.

I learned a lot from 2012 and if I could sum it all up, I'd say that life just takes a helluva lot of work. Life is more work than it is fun, you have to give more than you take, and you have to be better than you really want to be. For life to be worthwhile, you just have to work your ass off. Thankfully, there is champagne at the end of all that work.

37. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

            I know it's late but I can't help but think
           That the day hasn't shown all its cards
                   --Snow Patrol, "Dark Roman Wine"

Biggest Blogging Loser: 2013 Edition

Two years ago, I started a weight-loss competition called the Biggest Blogging Loser, and I opened it up to anyone interested. It was both very, very awesome and very, very not awesome. On the one hand, I met incredible people through the group. I reconnected with a college friend who's now important to both Mike and me, someone he didn't even know before BBL. I met Caitlin, who is pure joy, and an incredible friend. But, it was much more stressful than I expected and with over 100 participants that first round, it was just too much. (I'm leaving this all purposefully vague, but there were some genuinely not good parts, trust me. Oof.)

I've managed a few additional rounds over the last two years, on a more exclusive basis--inviting people via email or word of mouth--and it was much more enjoyable when I felt I really knew the participants and the number of people was more manageable. 

This fall, I handed the torch to Regan, and she managed it solo. She did a great job, and a lot of people have shown interest in another round. I think we're going to take all we've learned over the last couple years and manage this next round together. Here are the basics:

• I'm capping it at 50 people. This is more than the smaller rounds, but a lot less than the first (too-big) round. I think this gives enough people a chance to participate without making Regan or me lose our minds.
• Edited to add: The competition runs from January 7 - April 1, 2013
• The entry fee is $20. This is a totally non-refundable fee. As soon as you send your money, you can't get it back. Even if you drop out day three, the money stays in the pot. 
• The pot will be split like this: 50% to 1st place; 30% to 2nd place; 20% divided weekly to a randomly chosen participant who weighed in that week. 
• Winners are decided by percentage of weight loss, not pounds lost.
• You have to send your scale pictures (to me) each week (you can miss up to two weeks) or you'll be eliminated. (Again, with no refund.)
• You have to send full-body AND scale pictures the first and last week.
• Regan will be co-hosting this with me, so both of us will have access to your stats but no one BUT us will. Really, I've never been more of a vault than with your personal weight information. No one will know those numbers but us, swear it.
• By Friday of each week (no promise of earlier), we'll send the top-five leaders of the week with the percentage they lost included. No one in the competition will know your actual pounds lost unless you tell them.
• You'll email everything to ME each week ([email protected]). You can also email me any questions before starting! 

If you want in, awesome! I'm really excited about this round. Send $20 VIA PAYPAL to [email protected] by JANUARY 4th and you can expect the first group email to go out a day or so after that with the final pot amounts and all this information reiterated.

Again, I'm capping this round at 50 people. If it seems like it's getting close to filling up, I'll let you know either here or on Twitter (@shelikespurple)!

Here's to a healthy 2013!

Kindness

What do you say? Plenty of people have found (beautiful, heart-wrenching) words but I'm still at a loss. I try but come up empty. I attempt to join thoughtful Twitter discussions, but I flounder and misspeak and it's not just my 140-character limit, it's me. I just don't have the words for all this. For children dying. No words feel enough for the wrongness, for the sadness of that.

I had to stop by the store on my way home from work Friday. I was already raw and crying at the drop of a hat, but we still needed milk. I was checking out and my eyes wandered over to the next check-out lane where a flustered woman was telling the cashier that she had forgotten something important and could she pay for her cart and leave it to the side and then go back to get her missed item? The man behind her said, "Oh, don't worry about it! Go get your item. We'll wait." The people behind him all nodded. "We'll wait," someone from the back said. 

I started tearing up at this and the teenage bagger looked at me without alarm or judgment but with understanding in his eyes. "I'm sorry," I said. "That was just so kind." He nodded. It was a much-needed, beautiful moment.

Over the weekend I was at the store again, and a man was holding his laughing baby girl. He was kissing her neck, and she was laughing, and I heard him say to her, "I love you I love you I love you." It was beautiful. 

Kyle had pneumonia all last week and Mike was out of town for a few days of it. I was stretched thin and exhausted but mostly just worried about Kyle. Friday night, A'Dell dropped off dinner, snacks for Kyle, and a mini-bottle of vodka for me. I couldn't stop crying over her kindness, and because I have beautiful friends who would do that for me.

Children dying are words that shouldn't exist. They just shouldn't. I don't understand a world that has a need for those words and those words often. I cry just thinking about it, especially after last week. I cry just thinking about it. 

There is still kindness, though, and that's bringing me a lot of comfort during this -- I look for it, I'm trying to act with it, and I want to acknowledge it whenever I see or feel it. 

I don't have the right words. But my best attempt at them would be to say be kind today. And then again tomorrow.

He's getting hard to fool

I usually let Kyle choose his bedtime book but if we're being straight here--and I like to think that's what we're usually being--I've been known to attempt to persuade him toward a shorter book if it's late or if I'm tired. (Or if reading the same long book a 15th night in a row, which can make me stabby.)

Tonight I persuaded him into a much shorter book than I realized and when I got to the end, Kyle looked at me, annoyed, and said, "Three pages? That's it? Well, that's pretty short."

He'll be four in February. And something has happened over the last few weeks. Something surprising and shocking and weird. He SEEMS like he's going to be four in two months. Okay, that's not actually all that surprising. That's just math. I know.

But, well. I was never very good at math. Math was always tough for me.